Here are Luca Satana titles from Phase 3 (2019-2020) with best selling series like Mom Driver, A Simple Story About Fucking My Mom, My Aunt, and My Grandma for 3 1/2 Years Straight, Mom Eventually You’re Gonna Have To Go Back With Dad, Mommy Wants Every Shot, Holy Fuck I Think I’m Dating MY Cute-As-A-Button Irresistible Little Mom, and This Is Some Fucked Up Home-Schooling Mom.
Luca Satana: Phase 1 (2014-2016) ~ Luca Satana: Phase 2 (2017-2018) ~ Luca Satana: Phase 3 (2019-2020)
Luca Satana Series
Phase 3 (2019-2020)
Could it be 19-year-old Leviathan Curtis has finally found something he’s interested in, truly interested in, to the point that the word obsession might apply? At this point, his parents would be happy to find anything their son was interested in. His mom Hannah Curtis, especially. Finding something for her son to be interested in has always been something of a futile enterprise. It’s just too bad for her, or too good for her, depending on how you look at it, what Levi is finally showing an interested in is Mom Driver.
Joe’s mom Kimberly has always had a hard time getting up in the morning. That is, until one morning, when Joe decided to give his mom a boost. To his utter shock and surprise, it worked. And now, Joe believes all a mom needs in the morning is a boost.
Nanette Peters has been thinking about something, a thought that, to her surprise, she wasn’t the only one thinking, and that was she thought she was only sexy if her son, or sons in her case, thought she was sexy. A husband’s thoughts on the subject were a dime a dozen. But, a son’s thoughts, now that was truly something. If a son thought a mom was sexy, now that was true validation. After Nanette’s discovery, though she had no formal training, or education, it wasn’t long before she decided to make this her life’s work. And so, that’s exactly what she did.
Being from the twentieth century, there was a lot of things to get used, none bigger than how hard it was to put a smile on your daughter’s face. When I say that, I mean everyone’s daughter. My concerns, however, are only for my own sweet daughter. Not to mention, my wife Ora. My son Cyl. And my wife’s parents Wel and Ari. Dr. Gol. Our friends. And most of all, our daughter Cya. They all looked at me like I was mad. Or just a primitive. With primitive ideals. From several centuries prior.
Okay, to be fair, I guess, growing up, I’d been a little dick to everyone for a long time. So, in a way, I guess, I had it coming. I don’t know. And, now, it was payback time, compliments of Viper, The Black Widow, and Justice; AKA my mom, my aunt, and grandma.
A family can operate like a delicate ecosystem, where even the littlest thing out of place can cause it to completely unravel. But sometimes, the opposite is true, where even the littlest nudge, or even the biggest push, can, eventually, create absolutely perfect harmony. Absolutely. Perfect. Harmony.
Mom Eventually You’re Gonna Have To Go Back With Dad
It’s good to get away. That’s what everyone says. But, eventually, you’re gonna have to go back home. Eventually, you’re gonna have to go back with dad. That’s what Steven told his mom Charlene. Over and over again. To. No. Avail.
I don’t exactly remember what happened, or how I agreed to it, but, at the time, it didn’t seem all that unreasonable, and my mom didn’t seem all that unreasonable, or selfish. In fact, at the time, I was happy to do it, very happy. Especially considering everything my mom did for me, with her troubled pregnancy, and all my various ailments along the way. Why shouldn’t I promise every shot to her? After all, she is my mom. And I literally owe her everything. If you ask me, I’m getting off easy. Giving her every shot is a small price to pay, in my opinion. For all her love. And all her commitment. Of course, it doesn’t hurt my mom is an extraordinary cocksucker.
After my mom and dad’s divorce, my mom, my cute-as-a-button irresistible little mom, insisted she needed help learning how to date again. Well, obviously, I wasn’t exactly sure what she meant, but before I could ask my mom to elaborate, my wife, as was her habit, volunteered me, of all people, to help my mom. I guffawed, like I’d never guffawed before, thinking the whole thing was some bad joke. Then, I realized, holy fuck, they were not joking. Not at all. I gulped.
My first instinct was to tell them both to kindly fuck off. But, then my Mother Theresa-side shined through, and I told myself, why not. Why couldn’t I help my mom learn how to date again?Sure, I was never an avid dater, even when I was single, but, eh, what the fuck. I could do this. However, it wasn’t long before I was telling myself, holy fuck, I think I’m dating my cute-as-a-button irresistible little mom.
I’m not weird. Or bad. Just misunderstood. My mom, and my sister for that matter, both think they know me. But, they don’t. I don’t apply myself because I don’t wanna apply myself. I don’t wanna go to school. Why should I? When all I wanna be is, well, a rocker. And, I’m gonna be a rocker. I am.
But, all I keep hearing are those words, “As long as you’re living under our roof, you will go to school,” which my dad used to holler at me at the top of his lungs, with some real mean pipes, I might add, like Bruce Dickinson pipes, well, maybe not that mean, before my dad up and had a coronary, probably from all that hollering at me at the top of his lungs, or, maybe, more than likely, from all my mom’s mean blowjobs, which I can say, sadly, from experience, now, could definitely kill somebody, or, at least maim them, not unlike a head-on collision with one of my mom’s mammoth ta-tas, which were Guiness Book ta-tas, my mom and my sisters’ both.
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So, now, I’m stuck. And, now, to go along with my dad’s ghost hollering at the top its ghostly lungs, everyone and their mother seems to think I have to finish school, even my twisted fuck of an old grandfather, telling my mom if she can’t get me, the heir to some kind of small fortune, under control, he’s gonna pull the rug out from underneath us, financially – what a prick, like it’s my mom or my sister’s fault I don’t wanna go to school.
Regardless, that’s where I am. Thoroughly stuck. And, that’s where my mom is, thinking she has no other choice other than to go to great lengths to get me graduated, including homeschooling me, in her own, well, fucked-up way of homeschooling. Ugh.
And, if you ask me, this is all very unrocker. I mean, Angus Young wouldn’t put up with this bullshit.
Fair warning, starting back in 2015, something had become abundantly clear to everyone involved, and that was my sweet little 18-year-old daughter Ellie turns into an absolute monster when she can’t come, making me, her 44-year-old dad Harry, her 42-year-old mom Lillie, and her 20-year-old sweet not-so-little big sister Allie completely on edge and completely scared-shitless in our own home. I’m a man. I’m the man. That’s what my wife kept telling me. So, I had to do something. What the fuck is she talking about? Fuck me. So, something was exactly what I did and what I will continue to do as long as I’m a man. Or the man. You know what I mean.
At the time, Ian didn’t think what he was doing was all that bad. After all, after such a tragic event as finding out, maybe, just maybe, despite what every young man likes to think of himself, he possibly might have bad taste, there was no doubt he needed some convincing. And who was he to try and stop his mother Isobel, the good, loving mother she was, from trying so hard to convince him otherwise? Especially since, sometimes, simply saying, “Mommy knows you have good taste,” isn’t going to convince anybody of anything.
My mom is jarringly normal. And yet, she’s also nutty. Exceedingly. Certifiably. Hopelessly. Nutty. I’m not saying I’m not weird. Because, I am weird. But, my mom is totally out-there nutty. I never knew how nutty my mom truly was until the day I turned 18, and this totally out-there nutty side of my mom was unleashed on the world, and me. And, suddenly it became abundantly clear what my nutty mom always wants.
Remember, if you would like to try a kinder, gentler taboo-free version of Luca Satana, you could always go for Tura Brasi
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